![]() ![]() 'What do you do in the USA with your old goats that aren't producing?' These, she explained, were the older goats put out to pasture when Madame showed the group a picturesque hillside where many goats were 'Crottin de Chavignol' goat's cheese is made their guide, who was theįarmer's wife, led them through a process of cheese making, explaining how Nearby village of Chavignol and visited a cheese farm where the world famous In the Loire Valley quite near to the town of Sancerre. More Funny Stories for a Retirement Speech Funny Old GoatĪ group of Americans was travelling on a bus tour through France and were How many retirees to change a light bulb? He replied, 'Maisie, will you help me get The courage, got down on his knees and told her there were two things heĭelighted, Maisie answered him, 'Yes.' She then asked Charlie Grew even happier and fell deeply in love. Just outside Stubbington, Hampshire, England. 'I want them all to say, 'He certainly looks good for his age!' Classic ProposalĬharlie, aged 86, was very contented living in the Clarendon Nursing Home Want them to say about you in fifty years?' Turning to the third gent, the first gent asked, 'So what do you 'Fifty years from now, 'said the second, 'I want them to say, 'He was a loyal family man' 'I would like my grandchildren to say, 'He was successful in business', declared the first man. Three elderly gentlemen were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about them fifty years from now. In fact, I had the honour of being the first one to go to him in confession.' 'I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived, 'said the politician.' Just as the priest finished his talk the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. Had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.' But as the days went on I knew that my people were not all like that and I Money from his parents, embezzled from his place of business, had an affair with his boss's The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer. 'I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. He was delayed so the priest decided to say his own few words while they waited. A leading local politician, who was also a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and give a little Retirement - means you now can spend more time to spend in visitingĪ priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. Will claims he particularly suffers from numbers 3, 4, and 5. You have more hair in your ears and nose.You wonder how you could be over the hill when you.You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there.Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.Getting "lucky" means you remember where you left your.You step off a curb and look down one more time to make.Your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.It takes two tries to get up from the couch.You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks.You and your teeth don't sleep together."Easy," says Martin, "just subtract 191 from Wednesday." Will and Guy's Ten Clean and Short Retirement Speech Funnies The doctor shakes his head sadly, then asks the third man, "Okay Martin The doctor rolls his eyes and looks up at the ceiling, and says to Jenkin, It's a miracle they remembered the appointment!Īnyway, the doctor begins by asking Eddie, "What is five times five?" Three elderly men, Eddie, Jenkin and Martin men go to the doctor's for One for luck: I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. ![]() It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.Retirement: It's nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to.Importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent.The down side about retirement is having to drink coffee on your own.There are some who start their retirement long before they stop.Before deciding to take early retirement from your job, stay home a.The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.The company accountant is shy and retiring.The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what.When some people retire, it's going to be mighty hard to be able to. ![]()
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